My Journey:

Divorce, Break-ups, Addiction...this was my story.

Worthless, Guilty, Alone and Unloveable...these were my beliefs.

 

When I found myself in a sobbing ball on the floor, all my love having just drove away, moved out and left me, it was made very clear. I DID NOT LOVE MYSELF, AT ALL. I had been a product of divorce at pivotal year of development and moved away from my first hometown at the age of 9. Arriving in Seattle area, WA, no friends, absent-ish father, and entering 3rd grade. Already my limiting belief, self doubt and shyness were pervasive and the bullies could feel it. Attacking the, "Little Half-Jap,” (they would call me) after school and on the ball field with verbal abuse. It would take decades to recover my SELF.

 

When growing up I was always active in my body but after injuries I was introduced to Yoga. This began a new path and awareness to what it felt like to truly be calm, to be grounded, and to feel connection again. Even though my limiting beliefs were still fueling my unhealthy relations with substances as well as people I continued to practice! And, as i reached my rock bottom, where my only "friends," were the drug dealers, and on the path to be in jail or worse, YOGA saved my life. I was called to Hawaii by an old yoga friend/mentor, to utilize my professional cooking skill (10+ years) in a yoga retreat center kitchen. I lived there for 3 years and I learned about myself, I grew in new ways of compassion for land and others, feeling the incredible power of community support. And, I became a yoga instructor!

 

Having moved back to Washington in 2018, I was still playing out my limiting beliefs and "ALONE," on the kitchen floor I realized; I had no one to talk. I let my mistaken beliefs isolate me, disconnect me, and trap me in my own echo chamber again. But, I practiced, I found my courage, and I reached out for help. I began a deep journey into who i was, am, and will become. Finding a Jungian Somatic Therapist, working there my limiting beliefs at Group Processing Circle twice a week, Mens Council once a week, Breathwork practice with 1:1 facilitator and group sessions weekly, and of course Yoga. 

 

In combination with all the deep wound processing and the power of Breathwork to help me feel and ignite my life. I was inspired. Embarking on an 800 hour Breathwork Facilitator and Mentor/Coach program. Inspired by brotherhood I stepped into Leadership Training with Sacred Sons which has helped me trust masculinity in my self and step further into leading self and others. Inspired by community and connection to create group sessions to feel the repressed emotions we carry and express them out of the body; I discovered my SELF! 

 

I discovered what is means to walk an embodied purposeful life, I discovered that I have medicine that can help others because I was there too when my past was controlling me. Now, I take ownership of my story! Written every day with each empowered choice. 

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Aligned, Connected and Loved...this is my LIFE!

-Cameron Nagashima